Well, as you all know I've not been very well recently. Yesterday I demanded to see a doctor and I sat in his room and told him I wasn't leaving until I got some answers. Well....I certainly got some answers but it wasn't what I wanted to hear at all. When he told me I burst into tears.
One of the hardest things was coming to terms with it and being able to admit to what I had/have. I went to visit my sister-in-law who was there with a shoulder to cry on. When I went home I was so scared to tell Craig, for some reason I thought he wouldn't love me as much if I told him what it was. Eventually I couldn't hold it in anymore so I let it all out and told him everything. He was absolutely amazing and told me he's going to stand by me no matter what happens. Couldn't ask for a better husband.
As you might have guessed, I'm super close with my mum. We tell each other everything and there are never any secrets between us. Craig told me I should tell her but I was shaking at the thought of it, I was terrified. My mum has enough stress with her day to day life without having to worry about me.
After dinner Craig, Cody and I walked up to my mums and I got her on her own, burst into tears and told her every single thing the doctor said. She cried a little too and gave me a massive cuddle. It still brings tears to my eyes even writing about it, I'm so scared...
...at least now I know what it is and I can get the proper treatment I need. I did get told to keep active though and to try and not let things bother me too much. I'm looking to fill my diary with lots of exciting projects to keep me going over the next couple of months as I know they are not going to be the easiest of times.