Sometimes

Sometimes it takes the most random moments, the most random situations and the most random images to put life in perspective. I've been doing this a lot recently and I've realised that although my life has been hell for years, thankfully I'm past the worst now, I'm grateful for every single thing that has happened, if it was not for these experiences, good, bad and horrid, I would not be me...they have helped shape my life, my personality.

One huge change in my life is the absence of an old family member, still living...but absent, to my soulmate. This "person", which I cannot legally say too much about, told me over and over again as a very young child "You do not deserve to be happy, everyone else does, but you don't." To be told this as a child is not only disturbing, let alone it coming from someone you looked up to. The whole situation made me so scared, so frightened I couldn't talk...I kept everything a secret for 12 long years, until I was 17 years old. Now, with that "person" out of my life I have Craig. He is my absolute world. I still hear the phrase "You do not deserve to be happy" but no longer do I believe it, I now have someone by my side who tells me it is his mission in life to make me smile and keep me smiling.

The above image was taken by me when I was coming home from England. I was just playing around with the camera but I find this image, more than any of the others, inspires me. It makes me happy for what I have, appreciate what I had and remember what I've lost.
It brings a little saying to mind. I live my life by this philosophy, I even have a copy of it beside my bed which I read every single night.

I take the good with the bad, smile with the sad, love what I've got and remember what I had. I always forgive but I never forget, I've learned from my mistakes and I never regret. People change, things go wrong, I just remember that life does go on.

Just having one of my "deep" moments and thought I'd share it with you,

Kirst xx